We live in a world FULL of sayings. We listen to songs, repeat what we hear from celebrities, and tend to act on or live our life based on those sayings. You know, the sayings like…
- YOLO, you only live once
- Get Rich or Die trying
- What goes up, must come down
- No New Friends round here
Don’t get me wrong, there are some powerful and encouraging sayings out there. However, on the other hand, there are some sayings that may deem toxic as well.
My all time favorite was, “No New Friends“… I’m not gonna front, I use to say this all the time. I lived and breathed it in my 30’s and felt I was good with just my “triangle” of friends. I say a triangle because my squad was so small and so tight, there wasn’t room to add, it was only the 3 of us, and I wasn’t trying to change it for anything.
Don’t get me wrong, I grew up with the Girl Scouts motto… “Make new friends, but keep the old, one is silver and the other is gold…” I lived and breathed that as well. However… I grew up, got married, moved away, lost touch and reality hit on how trifling, low, and demeaning people could be. With that being said…I had a MAJOR mindset shift. I truly believed that I didn’t need New Friends. I didn’t want to meet new people or the worst part, I never cared to even NETWORK with people because of that thought process.
“Due to my past experiences with the wrong people, I shut out the RIGHT people…”
J. Robinson
Don’t get me wrong, I was NEVER evil, angry, or had a bad attitude when I did meet new people. I just had no interest in following up or getting to know them better. This thought process is definitely a TOXIC MINDSET.
Funny thing, God knows how to teach us lessons and make us MOVE out of our own way. With that being said, I was separated from my “triangle” and forced to engage, meet, and actually miss being around people in general. You remember, that whole year of NOT being outside. Just being back outside brought back that little girl scout once again. My thought process changed, because I knew, I needed to meet new people. I needed to engage, I wanted to learn more and better myself.
” You don’t know, who will help you get to that next level. You have to step out of your comfort zone and give “New Friends” a chance.”
Now, allow me to back up a bit. Prior to me meeting new friends, I had to meet my NEW self. I had to take a moment and see exactly what I wanted out of life. What experiences I wished to indulge in and what type of person I am.
Once I begin my journey of reflection and SELF-CARE, new doors have been opening up for me. I’ve been drawn to meeting new people and you know what… I’m having the time of my life!!
My point is, everyone needs a tribe, a community, not just that one circle of friends that you’ve known forever. The older you get, there WILL be new experiences life throws at you. You will find that you WILL get the chance to meet NEW FRIENDS. It’s OK, it’s super healthy, and you will find that when you have the right tribe or community behind you, you will learn more about yourself as a person. You may even realize there are things you never would’ve experienced or even enjoyed without stepping OUT of that Toxic mindset of “No New Friends”.
Life is funny this way. When you think you’ve got it all figured out…BOOM… there’s a “glitch” in the system.
Photos: Kappa Theta Lambda, Inc
With that being said, Go ahead and get out there!! LevelUp… do it for your HEALTH!!!
XO, Jami
#SelfCare
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